Seriously?

This is Heather and it's been 3 months since my last post... I feel like I need to make penance.
Geez... And to top it all of I don't have any cutesy pictures of anything.  I have some torqued and twisted pictures the boys took of themselves on my ipad, they're actually quite funny but I haven't got them on my computer yet. 
So, lets see.... since January... wow....
A lot has happened since then and yet nothing, I'm still working where I work and living where I live and raising who I'm suppose too (kind of).  Things did come to a head with Shae about a month ago and he moved out and in with Shyanne... it's been kind of nice to have a little cooling off period.  It's given me time to work on the twins and their boundaries and rules and consequences without having Shae poking and prodding them to they point of meltdowns daily.  I can't say I miss that.  I do miss him though.  He won't be there much longer, Shyanne has had a taste of raising a teenager and her and her boyfriend decided they just want to be young and live life...I don't blame them a bit... I would too at 20 and 21.  Go live it up while you can... So Shae will be returning soon.... maybe, I guess that's up to him and I'm not sure if he knows.  I don't know where else he would go, it's not like there are a ton of options.  The twins are going to flip out, they've mellowed out so much, they've been helping around the house, following rules, taking BATHS (that's a huge deal when you have stinky boys).  I think having the calm at home and the consistency that Phil and I have been giving them has been sooo good for all of us. It's kind of given us our 'home' back.. being that home is a state of mind and state of being and not necessarily a place...
That's one thing I have to give Phil kudos on, he is calm and consistent... not something I am use too, at all!  I've had the yellers, screamers and cussers as male role models (using that term loosely) that the boys have needed so badly.  It's been so nice and a bit odd, I have to admit,  to have that calming example when things are heading toward a meltdown.  He's so good with and to the boys and they adore him. I adore him.  He's been a good example of how men should handle things... I hope he has the chance to rub off on Shae a bit... it'd be good for Shae to chill out a little... or a lot...
Other than that I'm still in my hamster wheel, spinning round and round... doing what I do... raising kiddos and doing it on the kind of happy side of life... it's kind of nice over here...
I'm pretty sure I can do this, I know I'm capable, its just wondering if I have the strength....
I'll do better on this later... again... promise