I probably never will... I don't understand, even though I'm almost 40, I just don't understand why dysfunctional people get all the attention. I admit I'm not all that functional, and my environment and choice of people I'm around play a factor. But the more I observe people, the more I notice, the dysfunctional women get the guys... and the guys stay... is it their need to be needed?
So because I can provide for myself and my kids, I don't need love? or whatever it is that these other people are getting? So I don't need anyone to feed me or pay my bills or 'detox' me... so I get to be alone? I'm sorry but that's screwed up! It upsets me... and if I want to be with someone I have to take care of them? really? I don't want too... I don't want to provide housing and food and moral support for someone that wouldn't do the same for me.
I've worked my entire life... I had two years I got to be a stay at home mom... 2 years out of 19... I've worked full-time, I've worked two jobs, and I've worked full time while going to school... so it's ok to leave me? because I can take care of myself? so if I was helpless maybe I'd still be married?
And then the jealousy... what?
The more classes I take and the more I learn, the more I don't understand anything...
Hi Heather...well, if you ever do understand it, please clue me in. I don't get it either. All I can think, is that the time has come for women to become stronger by supporting each other. It sure doesn't look like the men are there for us. I don't see why women like you and JoAnna and Khrys and all of us have to be left wanting. Maybe there is some such thing as too good, but that's just not fair. I wonder why it is we hand over so much power to them. Why rely on them for so much? Perhaps we are always looking for the ideal, trying to create perfection, because it seems possible to us. But after all, we have only ourselves. You can't make anybody do anything. I wish you weren't so lonely. You deserve better.
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